PCIT Parent Testimonials:
"My son was 3.5 when we started PCIT with Elly. My son's mother and I are not together, and I think the transitions from each house and the different ways that his mother and I handled his behaviors was confusing for him. Both his mother and I saw an increase in not following instructions and tantrums at home and his teachers at daycare began expressing concern for his behavior disrupting the class, that's when we started with Elly.
One of the biggest things PCIT did for my son was provide consistency between homes. PCIT took work and effort from both parents, but was easily learned because Elly is a great and supportive teacher and therapist. We learned simple skills that allowed me to connect with my son on a new level. Through "special time", as PCIT calls it, I set aside 5 minutes a day to play with my son the way he wants to play without me giving directions or telling him what to do, while allowing me to be fully present and using my newly learned skills to help my son feel like he has my full attention, because he does.
As therapy progressed, we saw less and less problem behaviors from my son, and both his mother and I were able to bond on a whole nother level with our son. Once the parent child relationship was built up again, Elly taught us how to give "commands" or directions, using PCIT. Again, the consistency that both parents using PCIT provides is invaluable. My son learned that when he was given a direct instruction and he didn't listen; he would go to the "time out chair". It didn't take long before a warning about the time out chair was all it took for him to follow directions, then the warnings became less frequent as well as he became a good listener without warnings.
For me, I had become so caught up in the role of a parent, that the connection with my son was lost a bit. By focusing on trying to be the best parent possible, I was losing that vital connection without knowing it. By the time my son and I "graduated " from PCIT, our bond has grown exponentially and I now have the closeness and connection I always dreamed to have with my son. How I reacted to his behavior seemed to only increase those problem behaviors. I think that those behaviors were a sign that he wasn’t receiving our love the way we intended.
As a result of PCIT and this new connection my son has with both of his parents, his problem behaviors at both houses and at daycare are few and far between and any problem behaviors that do occur are easily manageable. PCIT is not a cure-all, it is a framework of how to interact differently with your child, it takes effort on everyone's part, and it is worth every second."
- Father of 3 year old boy
“I’m so glad I did PCIT with my child. It has saved my relationship with my child as well as my own demeanor on how I handled my child’s difficult behaviors. My son was diagnosed oppositional defiant and by completing PCIT I developed a relationship with my child that I didn’t know existed. Through PCIT, my child began to listen, follow rules, respect boundaries, learn independent play skills, and become the loving little guy I always knew he was!
Before PCIT my son was argumentative, defiant, played rough, and wouldn’t take no for an answer (mind you he is only three years old). I felt that the relationship that I had and wanted with my son was no longer in my control, and aggravating because he would not listen (to me). I am a school teacher and I effectively manage five-year-olds all day for 8+ years, but I couldn’t understand why nothing was working with my own child!”
Although PCIT is not a one size fits all model (it could be if you successfully complete the program), it has definitely helped my child understand rules and consequences more effectively than anything I was doing before. It takes a lot of work and dedication from the parent to make time for PCIT and doing the daily homework/special time with your child is crucial; however, if you stick with it through the end, you will see amazing results. You will not only see positive results with your child’s behavior, but the relationship and bond you have with your child immensely improves. I recommend PCIT to not only parents with difficult children, but as a key for any and all parents who want to build great parenting skills and develop respectful, loving relationships with their children.”
- Amy, mother of 3 year old boy